One woman discovered her finances were in disarray after divorce, revealing a harsh truth about financial dependence and its emotional cost.
At a Glance
- Fenella Lindsell was 57 when she realized she had no control over her finances after divorce.
- She lacked basic knowledge of household expenses, insurance, and her mortgage.
- Financial anxiety forced her to seek professional guidance from an adviser.
- Gaining financial literacy restored her confidence and independence.
- Her story urges women to stay involved in family financial decisions.
Wake-Up Call at 57
When Fenella Lindsell’s marriage ended at age 57, she found herself thrust into an unfamiliar world of overdue bills, expiring insurance, and unmonitored pensions. For decades, she had trusted her husband to manage their financial life—until it was no longer an option. Like many women who have followed traditional roles in marriage, she realized too late that her lack of financial awareness could have long-lasting consequences.
Fenella’s account is a powerful reflection of how financial dependence can quietly build risk. She admitted to having no clue about their mortgage terms, how much was left in their joint savings, or when the car’s MOT was due. The stress was overwhelming, she recalls, describing feelings of helplessness and shame.
Her experience reflects a broader crisis of preparedness. Research has shown that many women turning 65 significantly underestimate their life expectancy, which increases the risk of outliving their retirement funds, according to the Financial Times analysis on longevity and retirement planning. Additionally, the Wall Street Journal’s guide to financial mistakes during divorce identifies critical oversights—such as ignoring future expenses and failing to locate hidden assets—that disproportionately impact financially dependent spouses.
Shared Responsibility Is Security
Fenella’s turning point came when she found a financial adviser she trusted. With their help, she learned how to manage budgets, understand pension entitlements, and plan for the future. This empowerment didn’t just solve logistical problems—it gave her emotional security.
Her story echoes the warning raised by Gina Miller’s campaign against financial inequality, which highlights that over 75 percent of women feel unprepared for retirement, and that women often face a 33 percent drop in income post-divorce. These statistics underscore how vital it is for women to be active participants in financial decisions throughout their relationships.
Fenella now advocates for couples to share financial duties. This includes co-managing bills, reviewing documents together, and maintaining shared access to online accounts—not just to ensure transparency, but to foster mutual respect and security.
Lessons in Confidence
Having rebuilt her life from the ground up, Fenella stresses that financial management is not beyond anyone’s reach. She encourages women to start small: attend financial planning sessions, use accessible tools like budgeting apps, and ask questions—even if they feel uncomfortable at first.
Apps such as Money Dashboard and Emma are popular options that can help couples track spending and set goals collaboratively. These tools offer both partners a clear view of their financial health, reducing the likelihood of surprise debt or missed obligations.
Fenella’s story is not one of privilege but of perseverance. She didn’t inherit wealth or fall into fortune—she educated herself, asked for help, and made a decision to never again live in the dark. Her message is clear: financial literacy is not a luxury, it’s a lifeline.
